Warning: Rollercoasters May Make Me Pee My Pants

Amusement Park time! Where’s that Six Flags old guy when you need him?Here’s a list of rides I refuse to ride because I tend to get motion sickness. And I’m dreadfully afraid I’ll pee my pants. 

  • Rides That Go in Circles
  • Rides With Sudden Drops
  • All Rollercoasters, especially…
    • Hurler (No explanation needed.)
    • Ricochet (“Guests hang on tight for 3 minutes of wild fun!” Or in my case “Guests hang on tight for 3 minutes of terror!”)

“But rollercoasters are fun,” you say. No. No, they’re not. You’re mistaken. 

When you look at a rollercoaster, this is what you see. 

As if that’s not terrifying enough, when I look at a rollercoaster, this is what I see. 

 

There are some rides that I enjoy riding. 

  • Carousels
  • Ferris Wheels
  • Most Water Rides
  • And these types of rides:

Last year I went to Kings Dominion with Kiefer, Boo, and Radley. I waited while they got on the rollercoaster, and a lady struck up a conversation with me. 

Her: Not a fan of rollercoasters? 

Me: No. They make me sick. 

Her: Me, too. It’s because of babies. Pregnancy messes up your equilibrium. I used to love rollercoasters, but I can’t do it anymore. So you have two children? 

Me: Yes…(::looking around::) yes, I do. 

To the lady at Kings Dominion, here’s my confession: I lied. Boo and Radley aren’t mine. Pregnancy didn’t mess up my equilibrium. I’m just a wuss. 

If I don’t ride the rides, why go to amusement parks? 

Food. It’s all about the food. Where else is it socially acceptable to eat cotton candy, a funnel cake, a sno-cone,  a chocolate chip cookie smore, and french fries all in the same day?

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

22 responses to “Warning: Rollercoasters May Make Me Pee My Pants

  • Denise

    Love that pic of the bicycle going down the hill. I think a fear of heights and roller coasters is a fear we learn at some point. When I was younger I spent hours on rides like Free Fall and all those twisty, turning coasters at Great Adventure. Now, I can’t even look at them. I blame Ryan Renyolds. His fear of heights rubbed off on me.

    Carousels are even worse. They spin around so slow.

  • Amy

    The bigger, faster and scarier the better! And they HAVE to go upside down. I want my life to flash before my eyes (that’s how you know you are having fun).
    Although, that little space ship ride is wicked retro cool!
    One of my earliest memories is riding Space Mountian at Disney with my mom, I must have been about 3 or 4. I probably wasn’t really big enough, but my mom insisted that I go. It blew my mind and I had so much fun. From that moment, I was hooked for life.
    Funnel cake is pretty freakin’ rad, too!

  • The Idiot Speaketh

    That old dude on the Six Flags commercials usually has me quickly looking for a stool and a good length of rope…… I got my wife on a rollercoaster on our first date…..and never since……sounds like she suffers from the same ride phobias you do…..

  • firekeeper30

    I can’t do roller coasters either, nothing that has me falling. When I go to amusement parks my job is usually to hold everyone’s stuff while they go have fun.

  • leashieloo

    LOL, I am dying. I hate roller coasters and was always the spoilsport of my friends. I just don’t see the appeal of stomach drops, dizzying heights, and G-forces making me want to vomit. Nooo thanks.

  • TonyVote

    I’m with you on this one…i do NOT like coasters with sudden drops…scares the shit out of me…(almost literally, lol)

  • Aly

    Oh, I LOVE rollercoasters. But funnily enough, ferris wheels SCARE THE LIFE OUT OF ME. Seriously.

  • suzieashby

    Hey, I love your blog. This is right up there with dark chocolate in my book. You have got a bunch of cool stuff on here. I’ll have to check back and read more. Let there be cake!

  • welcome to the middle of life

    I love roller coasters! Sort of. Only the old school ones that are wooden and don’t go upside down at Mach3. And carousels are great. Other than that, I’ll be the one holding everybody’s stuff, too.

    That picture of the girl on the bike with training wheels is awesome!

    I don’t have cable either -going on 10 years now- so I have no idea who that old guy is!

    • thoughtsappear

      I’ve heard the old wooden ones tend to jerk you around a lot. Is that true?

      I thought that picture was great, too.

      That old guy is so funny. He dances around on the Six Flags commericals. Cracks me up every time.

  • the old coworker

    Stay on the ground, avoid all ups and downs, circles, spins and all. I totally agree with you and pregnancy has nothing do with it, you’re born to love it or hate it. I hate it.
    My parents used to take us to this place – who knows where, and they’d all get on a ride called the whip. I had to go. I screamed and cried the whole time. So they’d stop the ride and I’d have to stand there alone while they ride. I still cried – a four year old terrified of the ride but terrified of being alone.
    I always avoided rides. As a teenager I was even scared of the carousel at Glen Echo – it spins way too fast.
    WIth awful boyfreind in the 90s, he convinces me to go on two awful rides.
    The first, I see it just spinning – I figure I can handle it once I get used to the spin motion, I will be okay.
    So I get on and the ride spins, fast, round and round…. ok, I’m dealing with it. I shut my eyes. Then the whole ride goes straight up high, gets 3 times it’s height and starts going round and round and I am going upside down round and round over and over fast. I am screaming my head off! Finally it lowers, goes back down and spins just round and round and ends. I am furious.

    Next ride
    A water slide – innocent enough, but you ride a certain thing and it’s practically straight down. I prefer bumps, hills, curves, and of course, no covers so I can always see up.
    I get to the top and keep changing my mind. It’s high up there and it’s so fast. Finally one guy who is at the top, an operator, get sick of me and says, you’re going and sends me down. I scream the whole way and hit the boyfriend for convincing me to go down so he can connive me and make false promises to me.

    Since then, I have not and never had any desire to go to any park except for water parks. Six Flags was much better when it was Wild World. It was less crowded, more fun and not as many scary rides to tempt my friends.

    Last year we went to the carnival. I took Jessica on the Ferris Wheel, first time for her, I hadn’t been for maybe 30 something years. It wasn’t bad, was kind of fun, but you wouldn’t catch me up there alone!
    She didn’t want me to go on the carousel – and that was the ride I really wanted to go on, nice and slow, little movement with the horsies.
    I say, stay on the ground where we all belong. Enjoy the fact that you get no pleasure out of torturing your body going around up and down. We are special people. Those people who enjoy those things are – well – not like us.
    Next time they go, lets all hang out enjoying a nice fun game at Shadowland, or fishing, or shopping, or something flat on our feet.

  • jimmychoomall

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  • mescribe

    Alright, I’m a roller coaster junkie, I admit it freely, but this does not mean that I like those spinny rides that just go around and a round at a thousand miles a blink and leaves you woozy for the rest of the day. Nope. Can’t stand those. I get motion sickness quite easily, as well – unfortunately this usually occurs if I eat to much. Yup, double damnation, I go for the rides, but miss out on all that glorious food.

    Alright, so I usually stuff myself right before it’s time to leave and keep finding cotton candy in the oddest of places for the next few days, but anyway.

    Loved the post, girl! And those pictures, yeah, had me laughing out loud. Though the one with the little girl had me then pause and look a bit closer and go “Oooohhhhh, that IS freaky.”

    All my best!

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