Kiefer recently returned from a 2-week trip. That means it was just me, Scout, and Ozzy ALL the time. Plus Boo and Radley for a couple nights.
Whenever Kiefer leaves—as in within minutes of him getting on the plane and turning off his cell phone—Boo and Radley’s mom calls.
Their Mom: Can you keep the boys tonight/tomorrow night/whenever?
Forget that I already have plans or have nothing they’ll eat for dinner or was really just looking forward to sitting around pantsless.
This happens for each of Kiefer’s trips…multiple times a trip. To the point that I felt like she knew I wouldn’t say no, so she was taking advantage of the situation.
Two weeks is a long time to not see Boo and Radley, so it’s nice to see them while Kiefer’s away.
But it’s not so nice when I have to pick Radley up from school, take Scout for a drive to nap because she’s transitioning from 3 naps to 2, have to pick up Boo from basketball practice, and make dinner. And the last three things happen in the same 45-minute period.
I need time to mentally prepare myself for that kind of craziness. Not an hour’s notice.
To avoid me having a breakdown while Kiefer was away, he sent his ex an email with the days the boys would stay at our house.
Cue nastiness. She got angry. Said the boys didn’t have to stay there at all and that she could just keep them the whole time.
When the first day rolled around that Boo and Radley were supposed to stay with me, I wasn’t sure if they were coming or not. They came. It was a jam-packed night, but we made it through.
Dear Kiefer’s Ex,
Remember what it was like with your first baby? Remember that you had no idea what you were doing? Remember when you would take the baby for a drive because it-just-won’t-nap-and-you-just-want-to-take-a-shower-dang-it?
Now throw in two other children—who are yours, but not yours. You’re a stepmom, and you really don’t want to lose your patience or temper (SHHHHH! The baby is SLEEPING!) with your stepchildren lest they start dubbing you the “evil stepmother.”
I’m a new mom. I’m a new stepmom. And I’m new to single-parenting…even if it’s only for 2 weeks. All I’m saying is…I need some help, some notice, some understanding.
PS: Kiefer’s next trip is next month, so please reread this letter in January.