Tea Party or Plan to Take Over the World?

About a month ago, Scout started rice cereal. The other day while I was mixing it up, someone stole my seat.

“Move your meat, lose your seat.”

I have no idea what they were talking about, but I’m pretty sure it can’t be good. Esme Kitty is…well…evil a bad influence.

I hope Esme wasn’t trying to corrupt Scout’s innocent little mind.

What do you think Esme told Scout?

• A. Throw me all of your food, ok? Forget about the dog.
• B. If you promise not to grab my tail, I promise not to scratch you. Maybe.
• C. We’re the smallest people in this house, we have to stick together.
• D. It’s fun to trip Mommy. Don’t worry, she likes it. She also likes it when we attack her ankles.
• E. Other

Note: Starting Monday, thoughtsappear.com changes back to thoughtsappear.wordpress.com.

Is That Tuna on Your Forehead?

I consider myself an animal person. I love them all the cute ones equally.

Please see Exhibit A for my love of penguins (specifically Pete), Exhibit B for my love of wolves, and Exhibit C for my love of dolphins.

In the ongoing cat vs. dog debate, I choose cats. Only because cats are lower maintenance. Esme once opened the cabinet where her food was because she was hungry. So when I’m away on travel for a couple days, Esme Kitty can take care of herself. 

And when I come back, she forgets she’s a cat, and she acts like a dog by showing me how much she missed me and licks my forehead.

No, I did not smear tuna juice on my forehead for this photo op.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “You could always do what I did to scare my OBGYN away. I accidentally let one go and I think we all wished we were dead afterward. No need to explain why I didn’t go back. He didn’t come looking for me either.”—So I Went Undercover

Kiefer vs. Esme: The Battle Continues

Kiefer is allergic to cats. So, of course, Esme loves him. She loves him more than me, the giver of food and catnip.

In addition to their battle over the bed, Esme has also decided to claim Kiefer’s yoga mat as her own.

Oh. Did you need this to exercise? I’m “exercising” on it right now.

With Kiefer, Esme battles passive aggressively. I have absolutely no idea where she gets that from….

Passive aggressive is probably her best tactic because if Kiefer’s hand ever ended up like this, Esme would probably be out on her kitty behind.

But because I have a whore-cat, Kiefer’s hand will remain scratch-free.  Seriously. She loves guys and could care less about women.

Where did I go wrong? Maybe I should rethink wanting a daughter.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “What a bummer,you certainly can’t have a Chocolate Fudge Pop Tart to drown your sorrow, what to do? What to do? Oreos, double stuff Oreos will have to work, yeah, just suffer through with Oreos.”—Lucy’s Reality