Tag Archives: Old People Piss Me Off

Take That, Lady-Who-Called-Me-the-Town-Whore!

Back in December, a lady at the grocery store called me the town whore based solely on what I was wearing. Good times, good times.

Anyways, the other day, an older gentleman made my day by commenting on my outfit. I wish the old mean lady had been there. Yes, I totally hold grudges forever.

My mom and I were at lunch, and a group of older gentlemen walked by us on their way out. The last one stopped to talk to us.

Older Gentleman: I just wanted to tell you how nice it is to sit across from a young lady who is dressed appropriately and modestly. Thank you. You’re beautiful. Enjoy your lunch!

I was in an ankle-length skirt and white sleeveless top. If you’re dressed in anything else, he’s calling you a “whore.” Sorry about your luck.

I’ll be wearing that outfit every time I go to the grocery store now. Then, when I see the mean old lady, I can get all up in her face, look at her outfit and then look at mine, and be like, “Who’s the townwhore now, biatch?”

That is my totally 100% mature plan.

Anyways, after that compliment, the conversation took an interesting turn.

Thoughtsy’s Mom: Thank goodness he didn’t see what you were wearing when we picked you up from the airport the other day. I could see your bra.

Yes, that’s right. My mom told me I dressed like a whore. Sigh….

In my defense, what started out as a sundress, after 15+ hours in airports and squirming on planes had seriously stretched out and was very revealing.


Favorite Comments From Last Post:

  • “Ummm, carrot cake is a vegetable. Although, if its not, that would explain a lot about how that Freshman 15 snuck up on me when I was in college.”—PinotNinja
  • “In my dream, crudmuffins ™ are a valuable source of daily fiber.”—The Hipster

If You Don’t Have Anything Nice to Say…

As I was crossing the parking lot back to my car, I passed 3 older women. Right after I passed them, I heard…

Old Lady: Town whore.

My thoughts: Wow, she sounds pissed off. Is there going to be an old lady smack down?

I kept walking.

Old Lady: ::even louder:: Town whore!

My thoughts: Uhhh…is she talking about me?

What I Wish I’d Said: Takes one to know one!

I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure she was talking about me. What the….

I just ignored them because there were 3 of them…and they were bigger than me and had weapons. One of them had a cane, and all I had was a cup of chicken noodle soup.

How rude. Is my sweater dress a little short? Probably. But my ass isn’t hanging out. It passed the fingertip test.

Passed the fingertip test with a couple inches to spare!

Passed the fingertip test with a couple inches to spare!

Or maybe it was the boots? Is it because they’re knee high? Because they have ties in the back? I always thought they were pirate-like. 

Ties = Whore not Pirate

Ties = Whore not Pirate

Maybe it was my makeup. I was only wearing mascara, but I did layer it on pretty thick. Two coats.

So there you have it: The new definition of “whore” is having sex with 1 person for the past 4.5 years.

Since when does someone’s clothing reflect their sexual actions? I suppose if I had been raped while wearing it, I would have been asking for it, too.

Grrrr…why are people so flippin’ mean? If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

What should I have said? Obviously, I need more practice with comebacks.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “I’ve got a ring but is there a Give-The-Husband-The-Cold-Shoulder-Till-He-Unloads-The-Dishwasher-Day?”—Tori Nelson