Movie Monday: You’re in Treble

To deal with my Blarney withdraw, I went shopping. And I watched movies. Lots and lots of movies.

Starting with Pitch Perfect, here’s what I learned:

• Nothing makes a woman feel more like a girl than a man who sings like a boy.
• People work at radio stations because they like stacking CDs.
• Prince’s butt is so small that you can hold it with only one hand.
• Boone’s Farm doubles as blood.
• Horizontal running does not count as cardio.

Pitch Perfect reminded me too much of Blarney (because she sings), so I had to watch another movie to cheer me up: Drop Dead Fred.

Here’s what I learned:

• When cleaning dog poo off the carpet, it’s important to wear a dress and high heel shoes.
• You know a guy loves you when he throws spaghetti in a restaurant with you.
• Imaginary friends will play pirates with you.
• Eventually, imaginary friends leave.

Then I started to panic. Blarney was a pirate for Halloween once. And now she was gone. What if she was imaginary?!?!

Then the movie showed me that imaginary friends wipe boogers on your face. And Blarney never did that. Phew!

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Okay, I’m here. I will walk you through this. DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH POP TARTS?! This is no time to be a hero!”—Lisa Newlin

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It’s Not Goodbye. It’s See Ya Later!

A little over 3 years ago, my friend Blarney and I had this conversation:

Blarney: You’re funny. You can write and use the serial comma. And crazy stuff happens to you. You should start a blog.

Thoughtsy: What’s a blog?

Shortly after, Thoughts Appear was born.

When I met Blarney almost 5 years ago, despite her West Coastness and my East Coastness, we immediately hit it off.

Blarney: Hi! I’m Blarney. Nice to meet you!

Thoughtsy: I like you. You’re cool. I’m gonna make you my best friend!

Blarney: Uh…. Lucky for you, I like clingy.

Blarney and I discovered we had a lot in common, and we embarked on many adventures together. Some of which, I blogged about.

• She saved me from drunk guys hitting on me.
• We were roomies.
• I introduced her to Empire Records.
• We went to Hawaii (not really) and New Orleans (really).
• We became groupies for the Old 97s and Eytan and the Embassy.
• She let me borrow her dog Murphy for bean bag fluffing.

But in a couple days, Blarney is leaving. She’s moving back to the West Coast. And to make matters worse, my West Coast brother was home for a visit, and he leaves the day before Blarney leaves.

WHY IS EVERYONE ABANDONING ME?!

Someone needs to invent Pop-Tart-flavored ice cream ASAP. This is an emergency, people!

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Just an observation: You can’t spell ‘Team Ddot’ without double D’s.”—Hippie Cahier

Valentine’s Day: It’s Not Just For Couples

My friend Blarney is in a long distance relationship. And if you’ve ever done long distance, you know how frustrating it can be.

Especially when you’ve had a bad day and need a shoulder to lean on. Especially when you’ve had a good day and want to share it with someone.

Especially on Valentine’s Day when red and pink hearts and cute couples doing coupley things are everywhere.

To remind Blarney that even though she’s alone on Valentine’s Day and even though she can’t be with the one she loves…she is still loved, I got her a Valentine’s Day flower. (And I got another friend a chocolate boyfriend.)

I swear I’m not high when I say this, but…Spread the love, people.

Here. I got you a flower, too.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Hope you’re getting your Cirque du Soleil application in order.”—Chase McFadden

Sometimes You Wanna Go Where Everybody Knows Your Name

I’ve introduced Kiefer Sutherland; I’ve introduced Boo and Radley; I’ve introduced some of the blogs I read (see left), but I haven’t introduced some of the friends I’ve been mentioning in my blog.

I don’t want newcomers to my blog to think, “This girl is crazy! She thinks she is dating Kiefer Sutherland, and all of her friends have weird names. If I read her blog, her insanity may rub off on me. Stay away!”

Hence a new Who’s Who page for explanations.

I’m truly grateful for these friends (and all of my other friends not mentioned and all of you bloggers who have sent encouraging emails and left great comments).

 

 

Pat yourself on the back. Pretend it’s me patting you on the back. Over the years these wonderful women have taken my panicked phone calls and emails, answered my many questions, helped me with anything I’ve asked of them, and most importantly, kept me laughing through all of it.

Ladies, you’re the best.

Buckets: The Most Fun You Can Have With Your Clothes On

I can only imagine the kind of searches my blog is going to come up in after that title.

The other weekend several friends and I ventured down to Baltimore’s (pronounced “Bawlmer” by natives) Inner Harbor. Kiefer Sutherland and I walked around Fells Point a bit while avoiding the Red Sox fans who seemed to overtake the city.

Although I’m not a big fan of baseball, I used to work for a publisher who was located at Camden Yards, so I feel the need to point out the Orioles won that night. Please don’t hate me, Red Sox fans. When I go to baseball games, I spend the entire game chasing down the cotton candy guy.

Anyways, later that evening we ventured over to Howl at the Moon.

If you’ve never been, go sometime. It’s not the type of bar you go to on a regular basis (In the last 8 years, I’ve been 4 times). It’s a dueling piano bar, and it’s loads of fun. You request the piano players to play songs, and the bartenders occasionally stand up and do dances (like the Time Warp from Rocky Horror) on the bar.

One piano player sang a Lady Gaga song in South Park’s  Cartman’s voice. He was dead on, and I was practically rolling on the floor laughing.

Usually there are tons of bachelor and bachelorette parties, so you’re in for extra entertainment if you like to join in on the bachelorette/bachelor fun. These groups also are great for one of my favorite past times: people watching.

I (or my friends) may (or may not) have said the following:

• I didn’t know they made dresses that short.
• I think she just wrapped aluminum foil and Christmas lights around herself.
• Are they wearing penis pacifiers around their neck?
• Why is that guy wearing a sombero?

Eat plenty of food before you go because they don’t serve food. Which seems like a bad combination once you see what they serve the drinks in.

If you go, you have to get a bucket. Drumroll please…

Warning: You can’t see them well in the picture, but this bucket comes with about 5 or 6 straws. They are NOT all for YOU. Share the bucket with your friends. Consuming the bucket entirely by yourself will probably cause my friends (and I) to make (definitely make) comments about your drunken behavior.