A month or so ago, Radley’s mom got him a cell phone.
Almost all of our text exchanges involve him sending me pictures. Pictures of desserts, cats, and dogs.
Over the weekend, Kiefer took Boo and Radley to IKEA. A couple hours later, Radley texted me a picture of a cat and said, “Named Phoebe.”
Apparently, IKEA sells cats now.
These cats come free with the shelves.
*IKEA does not sell cats. But IKEA is guaranteed to make your kids so grumpy that you’ll agree to swing by PetSmart on your way home just to put everyone in a better mood.
Thoughtsy: Awwww….
Radley: Dad said we should get her.
Apparently, IKEA will also make your cat-hating husband (who’s only just begun to love your current cat) think adopting another cat is a good idea.
Thoughtsy: I don’t believe you.
Radley: He did. She doesn’t mind dogs and would love another cat around.
Thoughtsy: I’m not sure Esme Kitty would feel the same way.
When Kiefer and my stepsons arrived home, Radley came in first and said, “Wait here. They’re bringing you a surprise.”
Surely IKEA wasn’t bad enough to make Kiefer forget that he’s allergic to cats, that he only recently built up a tolerance to Esme, that the boys barely take care of Ozzy and Esme as it is, and that…oh right…we have a baby arriving in 2.5 weeks!
Boo: We picked you up some orange slices.
Thoughtsy: Thanks! No cat?
Kiefer: No cat.
So, no, IKEA isn’t that bad. But Kiefer also didn’t actually buy anything that needed assembly. If so, we might have ended up with another cat…or two.
Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Laying down with your feet up….isn’t that maybe how you got yourself into the pregnancy predicament to begin with?”—SandyLand
Thoughts Appear 
February 10th, 2014 at 8:59 am
Man, IKEA really does have everything!! Too bad they don’t sell babies yet. You wouldn’t have had to get all knocked up and swollen. You could have just picked one up along with some reasonably priced frames and Swedish meatballs.
February 11th, 2014 at 8:33 am
If IKEA sold babies, I shudder to think of the extra pieces they’d include.
February 10th, 2014 at 9:03 am
Love the cat storage unit. I wonder if they carry one for Bichons. The trick is keeping them in their little cubbies…
February 10th, 2014 at 9:13 am
While I’m relieved that you don’t have the added stress of a new förtjusande katt, a part of me was looking forward to the story of how you assembled it yourself.
February 11th, 2014 at 8:34 am
I am the queen of IKEA assemblage. I bought a desk from there years ago and moved so many times that I became a pro at assembling it. Except for the locking screws. I hate those.
February 10th, 2014 at 11:16 am
Any kind of new pet two weeks away from giving birth should be fair grounds for divorce…glad he figured that 🙂
February 10th, 2014 at 11:52 am
Who knows, he might count on that after all the hard times Thoughtsy gave him
February 10th, 2014 at 11:58 am
I’m all for another cat if the time is right. Clearly, that is not the case at the moment. Logistics, Thoughtsy. Logistics can be the problem. Where do you put the new kitty where the old kitty (Esme, forgive me), won’t tear it to shreds while you watch having Braxton Hicks and hyperventilating? Kids are useless with pets, really. And your new one won’t be any better. WAIT to get another cat! (Maybe 2020 is a good time.)
February 10th, 2014 at 4:42 pm
On a side note, I don’t know if there’s a contest for guessing what you’ll name the new addition, but if there is, I’d like to submit my guess as “Braxton Hicks” (regardless of gender). Unless of course this has already been established and Linda Medrano’s term of “while you watch having Braxton Hicks” is not about practice contractions but the actual delivery. In any case, I’m sure baby Braxton will be more than pleased to only have to deal with one feline in his / her new home.
February 10th, 2014 at 6:43 pm
Braxton is a seriously cute name (regardless of gender.) Seriously.
February 10th, 2014 at 1:51 pm
That outcome would have been completely different in our house. It’s my fault, but in my ummmm… Defense? The animal brought home with no permission from other house people usually has some kind of permanent disability. Who could say no to a cat paralyzed from the waist down and you have to diaper like a baby? Not I.
February 11th, 2014 at 8:36 am
Under any other circumstances that would probably work in our house…except changing only one child/animal’s diaper is enough for now.
February 10th, 2014 at 2:09 pm
OMG, this is hilarious! Way to go IKEA for designing a cat holder!
February 10th, 2014 at 2:28 pm
Maybe this was Kiefer’s revenge for when you made him think your water broke.
February 11th, 2014 at 8:37 am
If it was, it was weak. Not that I’m complaining.
February 10th, 2014 at 4:22 pm
That is one organized cat lady. Congratulations on snagging orange slices instead of orange tabbies – good call, Kiefer!
February 10th, 2014 at 4:36 pm
Good news: IKEA sells cats. Bad news: Once you’ve gotten the tabby 3/4’s assembled, they hobble under the sofa, hiss at you and won’t come out.
February 10th, 2014 at 10:56 pm
IKEA: Swedish for “Instant Rage”
February 11th, 2014 at 4:32 am
I will take one of each. Oh, and all your IKEA accessories with it 😛
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
February 11th, 2014 at 10:39 am
New cat and orange slices — totally interchangable and equivalent surprises. Totally.