Pop-Tart Thievery: What Is the World Coming To?

Until recently, I thought I was the sole member of Pop-Tart Addicts Anonymous (PAA). I mean, I’ve been the only one showing up for all the meetings. We I bring cupcakes or cookies since Pop-Tarts aren’t allowed. Obviously.

Now I see that PAA has other members…but they’re just in denial.

One lady called the police on her son when he stole her Pop-Tarts. Depending on my mood that day, the pre-PAA me would have asked…

  • You can do that?
  • What flavor were they?
  • Was it the last pack?
  • Did he leave the empty box there with no shiny silver packs inside?

Jerk….

But thanks to PAA, I can now say…

My stepsons eat my Pop-Tarts all the time. I had to get 3 boxes of the chocolate peanut butter flavor before I even got to try one. Did I call the cops? No.

Another man stole Pop-Tarts from a store, and then a truck hit him while he was making his getaway. He must have been too busy stuffing his face to look both ways before crossing the street.

Unless…the person driving the truck saw the Pop-Tarts, and overcome by Pop-Tart addiction, ran the thief over so the driver could have the Pop-Tarts all to himself.

Looks like three new members will be joining the next PAA meeting. I’d better bring extra cookies.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “If that ends up being your baby, Keifer is gonna have some explaining to do.”—Misty’s Laws

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

14 responses to “Pop-Tart Thievery: What Is the World Coming To?

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