This Halloween Stay Away From Gingerbread Houses

When Kiefer first suggested we watch Hansel and Gretel Get Baked on Netflix Instant Viewing, I was stoked. The title was a pun! Puns equal greatness….sometimes.

Normally, stoner movies are not my thing, but this movie was actually funny. Plus, Cary Elwes is in it…in disguise.

Here’s what I learned:

  • I don’t do drugs, but even I would be tempted by a chocolatey one called “Black Forest.”
  • Hansel and Gretel’s parents often go on weekend getaways with the Stiltskins.
  • If an old lady tells you not to eat her gingerbread house, don’t eat her gingerbread house. If you do, she will eat you.

Resist! Resist!

  • Any little old lady from Pasadena that deals drugs is a witch.
  • Don’t leave Skittles behind as markers to find your way. Someone (a stoner) will eat them, and you will get lost.

Most importantly, I learned not to do drugs. Ever. Unless you want to be eaten by a witch and turned into a zombie.

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

22 responses to “This Halloween Stay Away From Gingerbread Houses

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