The First Trimester Play-By-Play

After 2 miscarriages, Kiefer and I decided not to tell anyone that I was pregnant until we were out of the danger zone aka the first trimester. So here’s a post to catch you up on what you missed.

Week 4

I’m pregnant and barely have any of the not-fun side effects! Woo-hoo, party people!

Week 4 and 1/2

People, the party is over.

I get morning sickness…at 2:30 in the afternoon.

Week 5

Exhaustion sets in. I fall asleep at my desk.

Week 6

 I fall asleep for an hour in my car…at work. Oops.

I discover that the cure to morning sickness is chocolate pecan pie.

Week 6 1/2

Three pounds of chocolate pecan pie heavier, I realize I need an alternative cure for morning sickness.

Morning sickness subsides for a few days. Panic that I’m miscarrying sets in.

Week 7

At my first prenatal appointment, I see the baby and hear the baby’s heartbeat. I cry.

I am thankful for my returning morning sickness.

Week 7 and 1/2

Eff morning sickness.

Thoughtsy: I don’t really feel like ice cream. Oh…my…god…this is not my child. It’s a pod baby!

Week 8

Thoughtsy: Kiefer! Look at my boobs! They’re flippin’ huge!

Kiefer: I noticed.

Thoughtsy: But you can’t touch them. They hurt.

I cry…at the end of Home Alone and pretty much every movie that I watch.

Week 8 and 1/2

I smell ice cream cones. Not ice cream, just the cones. But it’s 9 AM, and I’m at work. My pregnancy sniffer is broken.

Week 9

Peanut butter and jelly is the cure to morning sickness…but only if you eat it at 2:30 AM.

Thoughtsy to Kiefer: Are you looking at my boobs?

Week 10

Thoughtsy to Kiefer: I need candy orange slices.

The next day….

Kiefer: I ate your last orange slice. ::pause; sees tears welling up:: Just kidding! Here they are.

Week 10 and 1/2

Candy orange slices? Who the hell bought those?

Thoughtsy to Kiefer: Are you looking at my boobs…again?

Week 11

I can’t button my pants.

Thoughtsy: ::sniffing:: What are you eating?

Kiefer: ::stops chewing::

Thoughtsy: I smell…M&Ms! Hand ’em over! ::Opens palm under Kiefer’s mouth.::

When he didn’t spit any out, I actually considered going in after them. He’ll tell you I pried his mouth open and stuck my finger in there. Lies, Lies, I tell you!

Week 12

Thoughtsy to Kiefer: You’re looking at my boobs. Are you at least listening to what I’m saying?

I have only one question: When does the morning sickness end?

Favorite Comments From Last Post:

  • “Congrats, girl! I am doing a happy dance over here. Also, I was unaware we had stopped celebrating your birthday; I was still eating Pop-Tarts in your honor.”—Sarah’s Brand New Chapter
  • “Yay! You’re having a little Pop Tart! Will you start telling people you have a ‘Tart in the Toaster?’”—Lisa Newlin

 

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

35 responses to “The First Trimester Play-By-Play

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