While I was packing and unpacking, I found a blog post I’d written in May while I was in Texas. May I present to you this 12-Step Pregnancy Test Program.
Realize you’re late and wonder if you’re pregnant.
- Find a CVS drug store that is only .6 miles from your hotel.
- Begin walking…in Texas heat.
- After 2 blocks, curse yourself for not taking a cab.
- Consider swimming in the Riverwalk to reach your destination.
- Walk one block too far.
- Look for pregnancy tests in the Stationary aisle so you can enjoy the AC a little longer.
- Wonder where pregnancy tests actually are. Near contraception? Feminie hygiene?
- See them behind the counter. Do people actually steal pregnancy tests?
- Because you’re too embarrassed to buy the pregnancy test, also buy chocolate and water.
- Realize why the pregnancy tests are behind the counter.
- Curse yourself for not taking a cab back to the hotel.
Once you return to the hotel, you’ll discover you no longer need to take a pregnancy test…but you do need to walk back to CVS for tampons.