The Greatest Cover Up of All Time: Osama Is a Zombie

Do you believe in conspiracies? I believe some. For example, I believe that salmonella is a fake disease made-up by adults, so children won’t eat all of the raw cookie dough. Warm cookies are delicious, too.

Recently, I watched movie about another conspiracy. A more important conspiracy.

Brace yourselves….

Osama Bin Laden is not dead. He is undead. He’s a zombie.

Here’s what I learned from watching the movie Osombie:

  • Don’t go swimming  in the ocean. Osombie will eat you.
  • Some guys hate wearing shirts. It could be snowing, and he’d still say he was too hawt hot to wear a shirt.
  • What do our Warfighters need? They need zombie protection.
  • Soldiers don’t need guns to kill zombies; they need Samurai swords.

That’s all I learned…because I didn’t finish watching the movie.

Wait…I did learn a new song: One little, two little, three little zombies. Shoot them in the head and wipe the brains off me.

And the movie did raise a very interesting question: Do zombies poop?

I don’t know. That’s why I didn’t finish watching the movie. I didn’t want to find out.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “I have my attorney put a cupcake clause in every contract. I gained so much weight now I also need a Hoveround clause.”—Pegoleg

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

12 responses to “The Greatest Cover Up of All Time: Osama Is a Zombie

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