Is there a movie that single-handedly shattered your childhood? The other night we watched that movie for Radley.
Every other weekend, one night is usually the night I fall asleep on the couch family movie night. Now that Boo is 12, and Radley is nearly 10, they said they were finished with kiddy movies. They wanted to watch a scary movie.
Their logic was that I watch scary movies all the time, and I’m scared of bugs, so surely, they could handle a horror movie.
Boo and Radley began perusing my movie collection for possibilities.
- 28 Days Later? No.
- Nightmare on Elm Street? No.
- Hellraiser? Hell no.
- Gremlins? Hmmmm….
Kiefer and I hadn’t seen Gremlins in awhile. Surely Gizmo’s cuteness would counteract the scary gremlins. Surely….
And they did ok. Even when the science teacher gets stabbed to death with a needle. Although I guess we won’t know for sure until it’s time for booster shots.
But then…it happened.
The girl in the movie begins her story of why she hates Christmas. Turns out her dad died around Christmas. He died in a chimney…dressed like Santa to deliver her presents…because there is no Santa.
And that, my friends, is how I killed Santa for Radley.
Stupid movie. It should have come with a disclaimer: Watching this movie will kill Christmas for your child.
Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Awww, you are the sweetest girlfriend ever. Maybe when he returns, he will bring your coat back, and there will be a ring in it? I mean, it’s only fair since you kept his tootsies all warm and toasty!”—Misty’s Laws
December 13th, 2012 at 8:56 am
Oh, powdery hell! I’d forgotten about that part!
December 13th, 2012 at 9:08 am
Hey, they have to learn the truth some day. Better in a movie than some twat in school. Then get made fun of! (note to self: don’t watch “Gremlins”)
December 13th, 2012 at 9:25 am
Oh no!! Did you at least try to mitigate the damage by explaining that it was just a scary movie that told scary stories to try to scare little kids? And that it was all made up and pretend, just like that teacher didn’t actually get stabbed? I mean, that’s would I would have done. Poor Radley.
And I wonder why oh why my comment was your favorite? 😉
December 13th, 2012 at 9:35 am
Gremlins also killed Furbies for me. Never could get past the resemblance.
December 13th, 2012 at 10:22 am
Ditto. Snarky, expensive irritants, those Furbies. Why did they have to make a comeback?
December 13th, 2012 at 10:13 am
Ohhh no!! I’m sure you can explain that away. Quick! Watch The Santa Claus or something. My almost-ten-year-old is waaaaaay into Santa and Christmas this year. He’s been asking a million questions. Some little punk girl on the school bus has been filling his head with non-believing nonsense. Betcha Santa doesn’t bring her anything. But Santa should give Radley a REALLY cool gift.
December 13th, 2012 at 10:44 am
I was just wondering if my kids were old enough to watch it and then you reminded me of the Santa Claus part…
December 13th, 2012 at 11:07 am
Let them watch Gremlins 2, and it will destroy any credibility the movies have.
December 13th, 2012 at 11:11 am
Once my oldest figured out that Santa wasn’t real, I felt kind of relieved like, FINALLY, that jerk can quit getting all the credit for all of my hard work.
Though if you really want to keep Santa alive, you could always say, “Oh no, sweety (or whatever term of endearment you choose), he went down the chimney because he was really dumb and didn’t know that Santa wasn’t real, not because there’s no Santa! Here, have cookie.”
December 13th, 2012 at 11:15 am
Oh no! Well, he’s 10, some mean kid at school would have ruined it for him at some point anyway. But still, probably not the family movie experience you were hoping for.
December 13th, 2012 at 11:54 am
Oh, my! I’m glad for this cautionary note, because I love Gremlins and have recently wondered when is too early to bust it out for my little guy. We might wait a few more years on this one, because frankly, my son’s Santa enthusiasm this year is making the holiday season for me. 😀
December 13th, 2012 at 11:59 am
OMG one of my favorite old movies and I completely forgot that it takes place at Christmas time. I don’t think my kids have seen it yet — I should have them watch it soon!
December 13th, 2012 at 1:01 pm
Dude, that sucks.
December 13th, 2012 at 2:01 pm
Oh damn! Double damn!
December 13th, 2012 at 2:08 pm
I forgot all about that! I’ll have to make sure the nephew doesn’t see this too soon. I don’t want to be the Aunt that ruined Christmas! LOL
December 13th, 2012 at 2:09 pm
Oh wow… Dads in chimneys impersonating Santa… Note not to watch it!
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
December 13th, 2012 at 2:24 pm
You’ve ruined it for me now, too. I am afraid to light my fire.
December 13th, 2012 at 3:01 pm
Gremlins scared the shit out of my when I was a kid. Those creature things are horrific.
December 13th, 2012 at 6:28 pm
A couple weeks ago, a blogger I know tweeted that she and her 6-year old were watching Gremlins. I tweeted back a warning about that particular scene, which apparently saved Christmas for the year. Sorry I couldn’t be there for you… You’ll just have to start tweeting all of your future decisions…
December 13th, 2012 at 10:01 pm
Luckily, the simple answer is truly valid here. All you have to say to Boo and Radley is – “You know movies are all fake, right? Well, since everything in movies is fake, what that girl said about Santa isn’t real either.”
Christmas wins again. 🙂
December 13th, 2012 at 10:27 pm
My kids still won’t watch that after seeing the scary things….they ran away…and then tried to sleep in bed with me for like a year…..
December 14th, 2012 at 3:00 am
I had completely forogtten about that scene – which means it must be about time I watch Gremlins again.
December 14th, 2012 at 9:17 am
Hahahahha. I haven’t seen that movie in SO LONG! Poor kiddos.
December 14th, 2012 at 4:17 pm
Hey, at least you can blame it on a movie. I blame it on cooking dinner. My son came in and said, “Mom, there is no Easter Bunny, right?” I was cooking and heard if they hit the age where they can ask you should be honest, I said, “Yep” He goes, “So no Tooth Fairy?” AND I SAID, “You got it, no Easter Bunny, no Tooth Fairy and No Santa!” AND he started crying, “What no Santa!?!?” I said, “Shit, I’m sorry, I just figured since you had the other two figured out, gosh I feel really bad now but yeah, no Santa.” He is 24 years old now AND the pain in the ass still tells everyone what a crap ass mom he has and how will have to go to a psychiatrist someday just for that screw up alone! Whatever, he was on his way to figuring it out and I just helped him out with his logic 🙂
December 28th, 2012 at 12:19 am
Awhh hahah
December 14th, 2012 at 11:43 pm
oh dear god! That’s horrible…and kinda funny. I totally forgot about that part O.o
December 15th, 2012 at 1:55 am
Well, I hope you can take comfort in the fact that it was bound to happen sooner or later.
December 15th, 2012 at 10:56 am
I don’t know if I should laugh at this…I mean, because we all know it’s JUST A MOVIE and Santa is DEFINITELY REAL! Right? RIGHT???
December 17th, 2012 at 7:00 pm
LOLOL i know i shouldn’t be laughing but this post is hilarious!
quick, show your kids “the polar express” before it’s too late to believe in santa again!
December 22nd, 2012 at 6:08 pm
Awwww how sad. Although it normally works to tell kids that movie makers are idiots.
December 28th, 2012 at 12:18 am
I just found out santa isnt real and i SOBBED