How I Killed Santa

Is there a movie that single-handedly shattered your childhood? The other night we watched that movie for Radley.

Every other weekend, one night is usually the night I fall asleep on the couch family movie night. Now that Boo is 12, and Radley is nearly 10, they said they were finished with kiddy movies. They wanted to watch a scary movie.

Their logic was that I watch scary movies all the time, and I’m scared of bugs, so surely, they could handle a horror movie.

Boo and Radley began perusing my movie collection for possibilities.

• 28 Days Later? No.
• Nightmare on Elm Street? No.
• Hellraiser? Hell no.
• Gremlins? Hmmmm….

Kiefer and I hadn’t seen Gremlins in awhile. Surely Gizmo’s cuteness would counteract the scary gremlins. Surely….

“Baby, it’s cold outside….” Let us in.

And they did ok. Even when the science teacher gets stabbed to death with a needle. Although I guess we won’t know for sure until it’s time for booster shots.

But then…it happened.

The girl in the movie begins her story of why she hates Christmas. Turns out her dad died around Christmas. He died in a chimney…dressed like Santa to deliver her presents…because there is no Santa.

And that, my friends, is how I killed Santa for Radley.

Stupid movie. It should have come with a disclaimer: Watching this movie will kill Christmas for your child.

Favorite Comment From Last Post: “Awww, you are the sweetest girlfriend ever. Maybe when he returns, he will bring your coat back, and there will be a ring in it? I mean, it’s only fair since you kept his tootsies all warm and toasty!”—Misty’s Laws

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