Over the weekend, I watched Roxanne, and here’s what I learned:
- Before pulling into the firehouse, put down the ladder on the fire truck.
- When a naked woman locks herself out of her house, she does want a coat.
- Jackie Onassis did not have a anchor tattooed on her arm.
- Never say, “Can I fluff your pillows?” to a woman.
- If you can waltz, you can handle a firehose.
- The size of a man’s nose is directly related to the size of his…you know.
- It’s impossible for me to hear the name “Roxanne” without singing, Roooooxanne, you don’t have to put on the red light.
The most important thing that I learned is that pickup lines used to work back in the 1980s.
But today, this line wouldn’t stand a chance: “When you’re reaching for a star, there’s a long way to fall.”