If the World Ends in 2012, My Conscience is Clear

Just in case the world ends in 2012, I thought I should Be Prepared (read that like Scar from The Lion King).

Apologies

  • To Esme the cat, I’m sorry I made you watch 1408.

    "It's too scary. I can't watch!"

  • To the person I stepped on at Markoff’s Haunted Forest, I’m sorry. I know the actors monsters like to hide on the ground, and my foot definitely touched you. I just hope it wasn’t your face.
  • To Kelloggs, I’m sorry I quit Pop-Tarts for a few months.
  • To the old lady I cursed while driving yesterday who proceeded to look left and right a gazillion times before crosseing a clear-for-miles intersection. You’re old, I get it.

NonApologies

  • To the cantaloupe I “carved” for Blurt, my only regret is that I couldn’t do more damage.
  • To the old lady I cursed while driving yesterday who saw me say, “What the fudge!” in the rearview mirror while she proceeded to look left and right a gazillion times before crossing a clear-for-miles intersection. Stay off the road and outta my way.

If something should happen to me, I leave everything to Amy, except for these items:

  • Smores Sprinkles to the newly engaged Whoopie
  • Things Your Mother Never Told You About Sex book to Nikki
  • Hot Chocolate to Blurt
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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

23 responses to “If the World Ends in 2012, My Conscience is Clear

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