I’m back from my cruise, and I’m feeling refreshed…and sunburnt. Don’t touch the shoulders!
Top 5 Awesomest Things About Cruising
- Access to ice cream 24/7
- Snorkeling in Cozumel
- Eating Warm Chocolate Melting Cake every night
- Grand Cayman’s beautiful blue, clear water
- Watching drunk people fall down
Top 5 Unawesomest Things About Cruising
Waiting in lines
Questioning the cleaniness of the ice in my drink (while in Mexico) after I’ve downed half of it
Seeing 200+ blog posts that I need to catch up on.
Realizing there aren’t any sprinkles for the ice cream
Overall, Kiefer and I had a wonderful time on the cruise. All unpleasant experiences resulted from other passengers. Such as women talking loudly during a show:
Obnoxious women: BLAH BLAH BLAH.
Kiefer: Excuse me, but could you please keep it down? We can’t hear the comedian.
Obnoxious women: ::dirty looks::
Me: Wipe that look off your face before I stab you with this ice cream cone!
I held the ice cream cone high above my head and prepared to bring it down…directly into her heart. Just like Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Then I paused to reflect upon my actions:
I would be wasting a perfectly good ice cream cone.
But it was free, so I could just go get another.
But the ice cream machine was 3 floors up.
To be fair, several women were talking, so I’d have to stab each of them with a new ice cream cone.
I was on vacation and that would be entirely too much work.
One of my favorite parts of the cruise was people-watching. Especially watching the drunk people.
So raise your glass to the guy who dropped his tequila bottle while reboarding the ship in Mexico. He didn’t let the shattered glass stop him from bending down, retrieving the worm, and popping that squirmy sucker in his mouth.
Drunk-worm-eating guy, you’re my hero.