The Toaster aka The Two-Mouthed Rectangular Beast

Over the weekend, I visited The Hipster. (Who, by the way, is now famous because yesterday she was Freshly Pressed.) If you read The Hipster’s FP post, you may be wondering if I noticed her award and magnet.

I didn’t.

Instead my gaze was fixed on a box in her kitchen. The box had two slots in the top of it and a wire that snaked out the back of it.

What the heck is that, I thought.

It looked like a mutant snake with an oversized rectangle head and two mouths. I wasn’t sure if rectangular-headed snakes were poisonous, so I poked at it with a wooden spoon.


I picked it up with both hands and gave it a little Christmas present shake. Still nothing.


I was just about to stick my finger in the snake’s mouth when the Hipster came into the kitchen. Before I could even ask her about the beast, she whipped out a shiny package: Pop-Tarts. After opening them, she dropped them into the rectangle-headed snake.

My jaw dropped. I had to fight back the tears. She was just teasing me by waving those frosted strawberry Pop-Tarts around.

Questions began racing through my mind: What had I done to offend the Hipster so? Why did she hate me? What kind of a cruel trick was she pulling?

My thoughts were interrupted by the strange beast regurgitating the Pop-Tarts. Ewww. Then the Hipster handed me the Pop-Tarts.

Phew…she didn’t hate me.

Of course I can’t resist Pop-Tarts…even regurgitated ones…so I immediately devoured them.

They were warm. They were divine. They were toasted Pop-Tart goodness.

About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

33 responses to “The Toaster aka The Two-Mouthed Rectangular Beast

Leave a Reply...or a Pop-Tart.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: