I have a secret to tell you. Lean in close, readers. I don’t want this to get out.
I love mashed potatoes and gravy more than Pop-Tarts.
I know, I know. I’m sorry for deceiving you, but I had to come clean. If I was on my deathbed (or in prison) and about to be served my last meal, here’s what I’m asking for:
- Fruity Pebblies (Yes, I know I typed “Pebblies.” It was a mistake, but I’m keeping it. It’s cute.)
- Gravy and Mashed Potatoes
- Hot Chocolate and Oreos
No Pop-Tarts. Please don’t dethrone me as Pop-Tart Queen.
When it comes to Fruity Pebbles, to quote Lays, “I bet you can’t have just one.”
Only one bite of Fruity Pebbles? Impossible. I love that sugary, crunchy, colorful cereal. And I seldom have Fruity Pebbles (unlike Pop-Tarts which I have every weekday morning).
Gravy and mashed potatoes: I typed “Gravy” first for a reason. I need more gravy than potatoes.
The potato wall protects the gravy goodness. The potato contains the gravy and keeps it from erupting all over my plate.
Gravy : Potatoes :: Creme Center : Cadbury Egg
(Teachers, did I do the analogy correctly? It’s been awhile since I studied for the SAT.)
And if you’re one of those people who put peas on your taters…what the heck is wrong with you? Don’t try and make mashed potatoes healthier. What’s the point of eating mashed potatoes if you don’t have gravy? (The only exceptions to this are those cheesy mashed potatoes and the garlic-herb-butter ones.)
I guess what I’m saying is: Treasure the gravy, people. Treasure it.
And finally, hot chocolate and Oreos. I’m gonna steal Pringles slogan here and say, “Once you pop, you can’t stop.”
Once I dip one delicious cookie, I go into dunk shock and just keep going…cookie after cookie. Mindless dunking and munching. Only the bottom of the cookie bag or dry hot chocolate cup is going to stop me.