Giving Thanks for Mashed Potatoes

I have a secret to tell you. Lean in close, readers. I don’t want this to get out.

I love mashed potatoes and gravy more than Pop-Tarts.

::GASP!::

I know, I know. I’m sorry for deceiving you, but I had to come clean. If I was on my deathbed (or in prison) and about to be served my last meal, here’s what I’m asking for:

  • Fruity Pebblies (Yes, I know I typed “Pebblies.” It was a mistake, but I’m keeping it. It’s cute.)
  • Gravy and Mashed Potatoes
  • Hot Chocolate and Oreos

No Pop-Tarts. Please don’t dethrone me as Pop-Tart Queen.

When it comes to Fruity Pebbles, to quote Lays, “I bet you can’t have just one.”

Only one bite of Fruity Pebbles? Impossible. I love that sugary, crunchy, colorful cereal. And I seldom have Fruity Pebbles (unlike Pop-Tarts which I have every weekday morning).

Gravy and mashed potatoes: I typed “Gravy” first for a reason. I need more gravy than potatoes.

The potato wall protects the gravy goodness. The potato contains the gravy and keeps it from erupting all over my plate.

Gravy : Potatoes :: Creme Center : Cadbury Egg

(Teachers, did I do the analogy correctly? It’s been awhile since I studied for the SAT.)

And if you’re one of those people who put peas on your taters…what the heck is wrong with you? Don’t try and make mashed potatoes healthier. What’s the point of eating mashed potatoes if you don’t have gravy? (The only exceptions to this are those cheesy mashed potatoes and the garlic-herb-butter ones.)

I guess what I’m saying is: Treasure the gravy, people. Treasure it.

And finally, hot chocolate and Oreos. I’m gonna steal Pringles slogan here and say, “Once you pop, you can’t stop.”

Once I dip one delicious cookie, I go into dunk shock and just keep going…cookie after cookie. Mindless dunking and munching. Only the bottom of the cookie bag or dry hot chocolate cup is going to stop me.

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

30 responses to “Giving Thanks for Mashed Potatoes

  • Todd Pack

    I was never a fan of mashed potatoes until a few years ago, when I discovered that I wasn’t a fan of mashed potato mix. Once I started making my own, man, that’s good eatin’.

    And you’re right. If you’re going to fix mashed potatoes, fix mashed potatoes. Don’t ruin things by trying to make it healthy.

  • 36x37

    Ok, now I don’t want to blow your mind or anything, but have you tried tossing some roasted garlic and sea salt in those taters? It’s like manna from Heaven, for real.

    This post made me think of something from years ago, and I might get this wrong, but: I distinctly remember watching some movie when I was five or so–maybe it was Close Encounters of the Third Kind? I honestly don’t know–but there’s a scene where a kid is making a mashed potato sculpture at dinner one night, and the amount of mashed potatoes on his plate is just unreal. I remember thinking–“Next time mom makes potatoes, I’m building a sculpture just like that. So see? Mashed potatoes can be tasty AND fun.

  • Lorraine

    Just when I think I can’t fall in love with you ANYMORE, you cook up that amazing analogy. I want to squeeze you and feed you gravy and mashed taters. (In the most non-creepy way possible, swearsies.)

  • Denise

    peas in mashed potatoes??? Everyone knows you are supposed to mix corn in. Then lots of gravy and mix it all up! You need something crunchy in the mashed potatoes. That is the best comfort food ever!

  • Amy

    Mashed potatoes are possibly my favorite food of all time. Mashed red potatoes with skins left on with heavy cream, garlic and sea salt – perfect. But, I’ll take them any way you want to make them. I even like the instant ones. But you are right, no errant veggies must touch my taters. Sometimes I even resort to putting them in a separate bowl just so no other food contaminates them and so the gravy won’t lava flow into anything else.
    I think your analogy needs to read: Gravy : Potatoes :: Creme center : Cadbury Egg. As much as I love taters and gravy, I can’t stand those Cadbury Eggs. They give me the heebie-jeebies.

  • Stacey

    Wow, thanks for stealing my “corn mixed in mashed potatoes is amazing” thunder, Lor! 🙂
    A friend of mine once taught me her great grandma`s mashed potato recipe and I haven`t looked back since. Leave the skin on red skins, mix in a little bit milk, like a stick of butter, a butt load of cheam chease, some sour cream, and some garlic. Holy heart attack, but oh so good.

  • leashieloo

    I would have to concur, mashed potatoes and gravy is the stuff of kings. It’s one of the reasons I favor Thanksgiving over many other holidays.

  • travelingmad

    Great post! I feel the same way you do about Fruity Pebbles and mashed potatoes and gravy!

    I could eat Fruity Pebbles every single morning for breakfast (and a late night snack) and I could east mashed potatoes for lunch and or dinner everyday as well!!

    That picture makes my mouth water. That’s how mashed potatoes and gravy should be done!

    Unfortunately I am in a country that does not eat mash potatoes and gravy. That will be on my list for my first meal when I return to the states in July!!

    • thoughtsappear

      July?! That’s so far away. I just went to your blog to see where you were. Flippin’ France! Want me to Fedex you some hash browns?

      • travelingmad

        Mmmmmm hash browns. That would be awesome if you could. McDonald’s and Burger King have great hash browns. I miss them (tear).
        McDonald’s here serves pastries and coffee for breakfast.

        Different foods are the things I miss the most about home. I love to eat. I’m trying to get used to the food here.

        I’ve told my friends to eat some mac’ and cheese for me this Thanksgiving!

  • thypolarlife

    Fruity pebbles and Cocoa pebbles are a favorite in my house and we constantly keep stocked. Mash potatoes rock! My daughter has them for breakfast when we have leftovers. 🙂

  • J

    I stopped buying Oreos for that main reason: I can’t stop at 1, or 3, or even 5. It’s a sickness.

    Mashed potatoes are great, but have you ever tired…DOUBLE STUFFED potatoes?

    You. Will. Die. Of happines.

  • J

    I think I spelled happiness wrong.

    Yup.

    I did.

  • The Flying Chalupa

    Yes, yes, YES! To gravy – potato awesomeness! But you have to agree, they both need to be piping hot. Cold gravy – potatoes does NOT float my gravy boat. Loved this post! Really, I could read about yummy food all day.

  • Vodka and Ground Beef

    I love that your death meal contains Fruity Pebbles.

    My love for you has deepened immensely. Great post.

  • The Idiot Speaketh

    I don’t believe you…. you must be delirious. Pop Tarts HAS to be your favorite thing!! I can’t start calling you MashedPotatoQueen….that just sounds weird!…… Come back to reality! a Pop Tart reality! It is who you are!……POP TARTS!!!!! 🙂

  • letmestartbysaying

    Are we the same person? I keep my extra-mega-family-sized box of Fruity Pebbles well hidden from the kids, which amuses my husband to no end. I tend to prefer my whole grain cereals a bit softened by the milk, but when I eat my FPs it must be immediately upon splashing the milk upon their crunchliferousness. Nomnomnom.

    As for the mashed…my sister-in-law will roast giant halved garlic heads doused with olive oil until the garlic becomes buttery in consistency. She loads a bucket of potatoes with this and a small crate of butter plus salt, pepper & the usual. You can smell the garlic in your pores the next day. I forego the gravy for this creamy, buttery, garlicy carbohydrate loveliness any time I’m sentenced to death. I only hope my SIL will be available to make it that day.

  • Catherine

    hmmmm…. I haven’t had Fruity Pebbles in years! I like then right after you put the milk in them, after that they get a little too soggy for me. I felt like I “grew up” and started eating Special K and Wheaties and Mini Wheats … now I’m feeling like a kid cereal binge is in order, with Cocoa Puffs, Fruity Pebbles and Lucky Charms 🙂

    And PS, never dipped an Oreo in hot chocolate. Will be trying that before this month is over. 🙂

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