This weekend I watched The Happening. Not impressed. I like some of the M. Night Shyalaman movies, especially Unbreakable and Signs, but this one not so much.
However, it did make me think. If plants one day decide to retaliate, I’ll be the first one to die.
Why? Because much like my feelings towards birds, I don’t like plants.
Sure, I think flowers are pretty, but I prefer cuddly things, like my cat. Plus she shows her appreciation and love by scratching me and waking me up at 3:30 in the morning.
Years ago, my parents asked me to water their flowers while they were on vacation.
- Day 1: Forgot.
- Day 2: Forgot.
- Day 3: My mom calls me to remind me to water the flowers. I don’t.
- Day 4: Forgot.
- Day 5: My mom calls me to tell me they’ll be home the in two days. I start to consider watering the flowers.
- Day 6: I finally water the flowers.
- Day 7: My parents come home, and my mom asks, “Did you remember to water the flowers?” Yes. Yes, I did.
Kiefer knows better than to ask me to water his plants—probably because I told him the story above. When he came back from Africa, he said, “I hope my plants are ok.”
My response: “You have plants?”
In conclusion, plants hate me and with good reason. So if plants decide to annihilate humans, I’ll be their first target. So you may want to keep a safe distance.