Introduction: Mars and Venus Collide

  • Always wondered about the book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus?
  • Never had the time to read it?
  • Want the Thoughts Appear version?

If you answered “Yes” to all of these questions, read on. If you answered “No”…what are you doing here? Go away.

You asked for it, so I’m blogging about it. As I read this book, I’ll blog the highlights of each chapter. Then you can pretend to have read the book and impress others with your knowledge.

Warning: I feel that my interpretations are the true interpretations. Kiefer Sutherland tends to disagree. He thinks I tend to exagerrate and overreact. For example:

Kiefer: Can we talk about something after dinner?

Me: Oh my god, you’re mad at me!

Kiefer: Wait…What? I didn’t say that.

Me: Yes, you did! You just said, “I’m so mad at you that we’ll have to talk about it after dinner because there’s not enough time before dinner to discuss all of the things you’ve done to piss me off.”

I don’t see the difference in my interpretation.

On to the book! This book is about the differences between men and women, and how people in relationships can reduce tension and create love.

Create love. That’s nice. If you have any tie-dyed clothing, put it on now.

Introduction

The introduction describes an encounter between the author and his wife. She had a child and was in extreme pain from the tearing (::shudder::) in addition to be exhausted from caring for a crying baby. And she was out of painkillers. Read that again. Out. Of. Drugs.

The brother-in-law forgets to pick up more drugs; the husband gets home; the wife is upset and angry; the husband gets upset at the wife.

My initial thought: Dear God, man! She’s out of drugs and she’s…torn! (::another shudder::) Cut her some slack! You know what she needs? A hug. And some more drugs. Hug her and give her more drugs at the same time.

Next the wife asks for her husband to hold her. I knew it!

Hugs always make me feel better. Even when I’m mad, a hug makes the anger drift away. Well, most of it anyways.

Lessons Learned

Men: Hug frequently. When your significant other is upset, just spread out your arms and say, “Bring it in.”

Women: Never have babies. Because the tearing will be very painful. Or if you have children, make sure you have a neverending supply of drugs.

Quote from the Book: “It is never too late to increase the love in your life.”

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About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

12 responses to “Introduction: Mars and Venus Collide

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