And the Hits Just Keep Coming: Eat This, Not That

David Zinczenko has once again ruined my day with his Best and Worst BBQ Foods.

First Doritos, and now this. Dave, Why do you hate me? I don’t know how many more food beatings I can take before I lose my will to eat entirely.

What happened to all of the posts that only mentioned foods that I never eat? He’s out to get me. I’m sure of it.

Eat This! Tortilla Chips and Guacamole

Not That! Corn on the Cob with Butter

Excuuuuuuse me? Don’t eat corn on the cob? But-but… it’s corn on the cob season. What if I leave off the butter? Nevermind. That’s just silly. How will the salt and pepper stick?

I don’t like guacamole or plain tortilla chips. Can I use salsa? What am I supposed to snack on? Why, oh why, have you left me hanging in this cruel form of torture?

Eat cole slaw instead of potato salad as a side. But I don’t like either. Does that mean I don’t get a side? My lower lip has dropped and is quivering at the mere thought of having a sideless July 4th.

Fruit salad? With different fruits mixed together? And different fruits touching? Eww. I don’t want cantaloupe cooties on my fresh pineapple or watermelon.

Come on, Dave, it’s July 4th, a holiday. Cut me some slack.

The Idiot Speaketh thinks I blog about food too much, but I couldn’t let this attack on corn on the cob (and Dave’s post that clearly singles me out) go unnoticed. At least I don’t mention any desserts….Chocolate!

Advertisements

About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

16 responses to “And the Hits Just Keep Coming: Eat This, Not That

Leave a Reply...or a Pop-Tart.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: