I’m So Old My Social Security Number is 1

I’ve noticed the few random gray hairs that have been popping over the last two years, but so far I’ve been able to hide them if I part my hair to the left.

But today I found a gray hair someplace else, someplace even scarier.

My shirt! That’s right. Not only is my hair slowly turning gray. Apparently my gray hairs are also falling out.

My initial reaction was to panic. I’ll be bald by my midthirties!

Now that I’ve calmed down and started to think this through, maybe it’s a good thing. After all, a gray hair fell out, not a dark brown hair. If all of the gray hair falls out, I won’t have any gray hairs, and only the brown ones will be left.

It’s like an age reversal. (Don’t argue my logic here! I’m in a panic.)


Anyways, I’m a bit depressed about my 29th birthday that’s coming up. I know, I know…29 isn’t old. Well, it’s older than 28.

You know what’s even worse? I’m turning into my parents.

The other day in a discussion I actually had to stop myself from saying, “Accidents don’t just happen, they’re caused.”

My dad used to say that. Spill your drink? Well, you should have been using both hands. You should have used a lid. You shouldn’t have been drinking in the first place.

Pretty soon I’ll be asking Boo and Radley to bend down to pick up things that I drop because “You’re shorter than me. You’re closer to the floor.” (My mom says that.)

You know what might cheer me up? Dragging Kiefer Sutherland to the new Twilight movie: Eclipse. That will make me feel young.

Unless I’m the oldest person in the theater. Maybe I should rethink this.


About thoughtsappear

I eat lots of sugar. It's the only way to keep up with my new baby and to outrun zombies. View all posts by thoughtsappear

10 responses to “I’m So Old My Social Security Number is 1

  • scarletsculturegarden

    I think you should stop panicking: my natural hair colour is a really awful colour that looks almost grey so it’s no wonder I dyed it… and I’m younger than you!

    • thoughtsappear

      For some reason, my hair doesn’t hold dye well. I’ve been baffling stylists for years.

      My gray hairs are appearing in a streak. (Some days I think that’s kind of cool and other days not so much.) My brother actually called me Rogue awhile back.

  • amyblam

    I’ve got the gray hairs coming in and I tend to pluck them. And then I realize they are crazy thick and have some wave to them unlike my normal hair. So my hairs and I will be going the coloring route soon.

  • redriverpak

    First of all, if you drag Mr. Radley to see the new Twilight pic, it may end up being used against you in divorce proceeding, if you do tie the knot somewhere down the line…..and second, yes….you WILL be the oldest one in the theater…..by about 10 years…… 🙂

    • thoughtsappear

      Don’t tell him I told you, but Kiefer actually saw the first Twilight movie with me. He did say he’d go with me to see the Eclipse movie, but he said it in a way that if I actually take him, I’ll feel really guilty.

  • blogmella

    I have LOTS of grey (English spelling) hair. Even in my PUBES. *sobbing*

  • confessionsofadizzyblonde

    aaahhhhh Twilight… yes, oh yes Edward…this makes me feel like an over grown (I mean, too old, I mean, uh) teenager that is no longer a teenager… The first movie was nice. The books…I read them all in a week. iw as awake till 5am…uh. I liked them… The second movie made me furious. I’m a director. I think they trashed the book. I thought the actors weren’t directed properly. I thought, I thought, I thought… However, for the sake of that vampire, I will see Eclipse too… =)

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