Last night, for the very first time ever, I sang karaoke. That’s right. I turn 29 in June, and never have I ever sung karaoke. Never have I ever sung (solo) anywhere except in my car or the shower.
This one time…in middle school, we auditioned in chorus, and I had to sing by myself for the teacher. I was so nervous that when I opened my mouth to sing, my voice hit high notes that I didn’t think were possible. Alto to soprano instanteously. Since then, I’ve avoided singing in front of people altogether. When Boo and Radley ask me to play Rock Band and it’s my turn to sing, I sing as quietly as possible and hold the mic very far away from my mouth. Just close enough to pick up the notes so I still get a good score, but far away enough that anyone not sitting right next to me can’t hear a thing.
As a side note, this does not work with the karaoke mic. Once I tried to hold it far away, I may have even had it at arm’s length, and still my voice came through loud and clear. People watching probably thought that I thought the mic was attacking me, or at least had cooties.
Anyways, the only reason I sang was because the bar was pretty empty. I figure if I was ever going to sing karaoke, last night was the time. Less people to laugh at me.
If you’re a karaoke novice, here are the steps I followed:
- Drag my good friend Stone Cold Blarney out to car so she can prescreen my voice. If I’m really awful or tone deaf, I want to know ahead of time.
- After Blarney’s approval, I check to make sure the DJ had “3 AM” by Matchbox 20. (I love almost every Matchbox 20 song.)
- Actually turn in the song choice to the DJ. This is essential.
- Upon handing the song choice to the DJ (remember to let go), ask him if he would be willing to fade the song out after a minute or so, just in case I suck. He agrees and tells me to just give him a signal if I want to stop. (During the musical break, I turned around and asked if I needed to stop, and he said I was doing good, so I completed the song.)
- Actually get up on stage when called and sing.
All steps were successfully completed. I always thought karaoke singers were brave to get up there and sing, but I now have a newfound appreciation for their courage. Why?
- Because you think you know every word to a song, but you really don’t. When some of those phrases flash up on the screen, there’s always at least one that you’re like, “Ohhhh…so that’s what they say there. I always thought they said, ‘monkey butt.'”
- And the speakers disorient you. You can hear the music and even hear yourself singing and it’s easy to get messed up on the timing. I definitely had some slip ups.
- The lights are tricky, too. You look out into the crowd inbetween verses, hoping to see one friendly face and you can only see shadows.
Unfortunately, Kiefer had stepped outside, so he didn’t actually get to hear me. Part of me is relieved, but part of me is a bit disappointed. He apologized, but it was a first (and maybe only) and he missed it.
But thanks to all my friends who cheered me on!
Karaoke singers, I salute you!