How to Save a Life

Remember when the Russian Mafia killed that poor guy because I didn’t click on his link? I still feel bad about that, so I periodically check my SPAM comments.

Random Act of Kindness for the Day: Check your SPAM comments. It may save a life…in particular, the life of a man kidnapped by the Russian mafia and subjected to penis enlargement.

Here are some entertaining SPAM comments I found recently:

I would name your blog The Dreamland! While Santa knocks at our door just once per year, your blog is open the whole year – wow!

Flattery will get you everywhere, my friend.

Wow, that was odd. I just wrote an incredibly long comment, but after I clicked “Submit,” my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr…well, I’m not writing all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say wonderful blog!

Dude, that sucks. I’m sorry your comment was marked as SPAM. Wait…your website is f*ckbuddy.com? And your email address is tollfree@gmail.com? Hmmmm…that’s suspicious.

If I press my hand against my eye, the afterimage looks like the floating Great Pumpkin Moon on Halloween.

Riiiiiiiight….

Then after about 5 minutes I cleaned up the poo and went to let Bear in, got both dogs on their leashes, and took them outside.

Why did you wait 5 minutes to clean up the poo? And I don’t have any dogs, but I’m pretty sure the order is this:

  1. Let the dogs outside.
  2. Then they poo.
  3. Then let them back inside.

Can anyone confirm the order of the dog potty steps?

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About thoughtsappear

I'm about to have my first child...who I promised to Rumpelstiltskin. Shhhhhh.... Hopefully he won't find out. View all posts by thoughtsappear

34 responses to “How to Save a Life

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